I know, I know. Neuro-Linguistic Programming is a study unto itself, with piles of books written about it, its own set of gurus, and so on. But since we’re dealing with basics here, it should be all right with the NLP Illuminati if we just talk about the broad strokes.
NLP is really about identifying the emphasis, length and pace of verbal communication to help create or decode signals of true intent. And once you start to pay attention to these signals, it makes communication much clearer.
You already might know quite a bit about NLP. Besides detecting tones of sarcasm, happiness, anger, sadness and so on, you might have had a grade school teacher, who, like mine, would say something like this:
“DO not write on the test paper. Do NOT write on the test paper. Do not WRITE on the test paper. Do not write ON the test paper. Do not write on THE test paper. Do not write on the TEST paper. Do not write on the test PAPER.”
If you try saying that sentence out loud, with additional emphasis on the capitalized word in each sentence, you’ll notice a structure and definition shift in what you’re saying.
Another good way to study NLP is to watch movies and TV shows with good actors in them. The subtleties of their line deliveries can help you to understand some of the underpinnings of NLP, how it works, and how to use it. I recommend starting with someone who puts in a little extra emphasis in their words. While some may say that anything from Al Pacino or Robert Deniro over the last 20 years would be a good example, I prefer the master: Christopher Walken.
NLP can be used as a tool for both evil (subtly hinting at things to lead others to do your bidding) and good (understanding the underpinnings of a conversation), but in both cases works as a supplement to body language. Remember to watch your tone and be aware of others’ conversational variances if you want to understand what they’re REALLY saying.
