20
Mar
This week, I got to help with a clinical trial. All I can say is that it involved being shot up with a small dose of radiation and lying perfectly still for several hours. Here’s what I learned:
- Paralysis is worse than you could ever imagine. I still had use of my various appendages, but I really could not move. I would get a pain in my leg and couldn’t stretch it. My nose would itch and I couldn’t scratch it. There have been very few times in my life where I’ve experienced the pure joy from something as simple as being able to sit up straight, but this was a revelation. I only had to deal with forcing myself to remain still – it was voluntary. But through those hours, I gained a better understanding of what people like Christopher Reeve and Stephen Hawking deal with; the torture of wanting to move, but not being able. The disconnect between thought and action was more powerful than I would have thought. The joy I’ve felt over the last few days at doing everything from typing on a keyboard to running to changing my position while lying down hasn’t dimmed; mobility is something that’s easy to take for granted.
- The simplest things can be the most difficult. Remember that link in the JTSCBAKS about how astronauts do their personal business in space? Turns out that gravity doesn’t have to be nil in order for there to be a problem. It’s extremely problematic when you have to pee and can’t move for several hours. Let’s just leave it at that.
- Funny German words can help relieve stress. In addition to passing the time while identifying the disparity between platonic ideals and the weltschmerz of reality, I also considered the future implications of the schadenfreude people would gain when I told them about the experience. Like, say, blog readers.
- Good things come to those who wait. It seemed like an eternity, but once my time on the table had passed, it was a relief. I realized that I had done my part and wouldn’t have to be in that situation again for (hopefully) a long time. Plus, I got to go to the bathroom.
So even though the radiation didn’t make me a superhero, I’m happy to say that I learned a few things. Of course, trying to explain to people the understated value of limbs isn’t as easy as it sounds.
