Needle, Meet Haystack

A while ago, I realized that while Needle, Meet Haystack may be my personal view on things, it isn’t the only view.  So every other Friday, you’ll be getting the chance to read some awesome guest posts from some truly excellent people – the Needle, Meet Haystack Guest Blogger Club.

JR Moreau, the not-so-literal fellow behind JR Moreau’s Not So Literal, a blog in which he discusses pop culture, social media strategy, working as a freelancer, and the challenges of life.  JR currently works as a freelance community and brand manager, using his skills to develop companies and help them learn to connect with their customers.  He’s one of the most consistently great bloggers around, and in his post today, he tackles one of the most pressing issues of our time: Friday Happy Hour.

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I got laid off from my last job in February and was launched into the amazing world of freelancing involuntarily. You have no idea how great it is to be able to chase clients for money, attempt futilely to save 30% of everything you make for taxes, and become an utter recluse because your cafe places become spots of hardcore competitive/judgmental paranoia rather than productivity.

But I’m here, I’m making the best of it, and I’ve traveled more in the last 7 months than the rest of my life combined. Life’s actually been great for me as a freelancer. I manage to pay rent, eat food, drink beers (or go to therapy), and afford health insurance. Well, I would if I had health insurance. But what do I really miss about working for “The Man” or “The Woman?” Friday Happy Hour!

So, in an attempt to rationalize getting excited about a single day during a week rather than having them blur all together, here’s my list of the 5 reasons that Fridays can be wet, wild and fun for freelancers too, or at least why it’s okay to be a bad influence on your friends.

1. You don’t feel like an asshole for bugging your friends to go out and drink with you. When I first went solo, going out and drinking or socializing on a weeknight wasn’t a big deal because I could wake up whenever I wanted and work to my own schedule. Unfortunately, getting friends with jobs to put back beers with you on a Tuesday isn’t really normal or useful if they’re trying to be the best 9-5′ers that they can. But when Friday rolls around, you can be the boisterous, exuberant friend that you want to be and drag your downer, “steady-life” friends out for a drink. You owe it to them, and considering how you’re going to go crazy without some socialization outside of the voices in your head, they owe it to you too.
2. If you’ve burned through all of your day job-having friends, you can still get a good meal with drinks for cheap, which is really important when money’s tight and your client’s haven’t answered your last 3 invoices. Happy Hours tend to be packed and generally un-enjoyable if you’re sober, which is why everyone races to the bar as soon as they get let out of work. As a freelancer, you can go and cozy up to the bar before the bull-rush and get the fresh appetizers and drinks before the crowds.
3. It’s the easiest day to get your friends to play hooky with you. You can take really fun looking Twitpics, post updates on Facebook and Twitter that you’re going on this awesome hike/tubing/safari trip and then be like, “I’ve got a couple extra spots. Who’s coming?!?!” On Friday, you’re a lot more likely to get some responses at least asking if you can push up the departure date to, say, 4:15 PM.
4. Friday means “don’t bother me after 5:00 PM, unless you’re paying me really well for it or if it’s in my contract.” Certain contracts of mine require I be “on call” 24-7, but in reality if I get an alert in my email, 99% of the time, I can address it within 10 minutes on my phone, and then I’m back to whatever degenerate activities I was doing before. When you’re on salary, try telling your slave-driver boss that you’re not going to finish up that quarter end report on Saturday and Sunday. I dare you.
5. Friday is pay day! Wait, it isn’t for most freelancers….let’s just skip number five…

In all seriousness, this tongue-in-cheek post is more an observation of some of the embarrassing and annoying instances of being a freelancer. It’s also led to more opportunities to professional and even personal fulfillment than I have ever had in my life. Plus I figure that it’s better to struggle to find work and stay busy than to deal with the stigma of collecting unemployment for month after month while you wait in the breadline that is job-boards, temp-work centers and recruiting phone lists.

So here’s to enjoying Friday and every day to the best of your ability regardless of your client load, bank account balance or anything that doesn’t involve good people and a love for life.

And if you’re at you’re day job and reading this, get back to work!

A while ago, I realized that while Needle, Meet Haystack may be my personal view on things, it isn’t the only view.  So every other Friday, you’ll be getting the chance to read some awesome guest posts from some truly excellent people – the Needle, Meet Haystack Guest Blogger Club.

Ashley Campbell blogs about careers, office politics, freelancing, generation gaps and more at Entry Level Observations.  Professionally, she pulls double-duty as a social media strategist and freelance PR maven.  In addition to contributing to the Great Idea Garage Sale with a piece on dealing with a job you hate.  In her post today, she tackles the concept of social media friendships in the age of the new social contract:

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I have a minor obsession with social media… That’s a good thing considering it’s quickly becoming my livelihood. I love social media for a lot of reasons: its power to transform a brand, the incredible ease at which information, advice and news is disseminated and, my personal favorite, the amazing connections one can make with people across the country and even across the world.

The relationships I’ve built over the past 7 months alone via social media are incredible. I’ve collaborated with a new friend in Australia, written guest posts for new friends in New York City, Oklahoma, next week California and of course right now I have the privilege of guest posting for the amazing and talented Mr. Andrew Weitsman in Arizona! I have made real friends who I talk with regularly online and I have even met and collaborated with people in my own city I would never have met otherwise. I basically have a brand new network of amazing people with whom I can share my life, bounce ideas off of, learn from and even get support from when I need it.

The crazy part about this is that besides the folks I’ve met in Kansas City through TweetUps and an incredible social media conference I attended a few months ago, I haven’t actually met anyone else in person. This brand new support system I’ve created is comprised mostly of people who I only know through their tweets, blog posts or instant messages and I think that’s way cool. Meanwhile, my mother, the lady who doesn’t trust the internet, is convinced these people want to cut my skin off and wear it like a suit…but I digress.

My point is that social media has the power to bring people together. Heck, if it weren’t for social media, I wouldn’t be friends with Andrew and this post wouldn’t even be happening! Some people (take ALL of my friends , for example) think social media means having a Facebook profile or that Twitter is lame because you just tell people what you’re doing all day long, but it’s so much more than that. Social media is about branding and sharing and learning and connecting!

I consider myself so very lucky to have met all of the amazing people I have in the past several months. My new network of online friends might be a tad unconventional, but I’ve never really been one for doing things by the book.

So this is my big “thank you for being a part of my life” to everyone I’ve never actually met in real life. You are fantastic and someday I think I’d like to party with you…

A while ago, I realized that while Needle, Meet Haystack may be my personal view on things, it isn’t the only view.  So every other Friday, you’ll be getting the chance to read some awesome guest posts from some truly excellent people – the Needle, Meet Haystack Guest Blogger Club.

Mehnaz Thawer, of Speak Softly and Carry A Red Pen (formerly Strawberry Ghetto), blogs about language, business, pop culture, and the struggles of being an introvert.  When she’s not busy proving that Canadians can be way more awesome than one might expect, Mehnaz works as a freelance writer and editor.  Her post today happens to be one of my favorite subjects: language and writing.

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I love language. I love everything about it from syntax to semantics.  I’m a big fan of grammar and clever usage.  I sometimes write down words I think are kind of fun on sticky notes so I can use them later.  My friend once did one of those “most likely” quizzes on Facebook, and voted me “most likely to correct your grammar.”  I have a shirt that says “Thesaurus Rex.”  It’s pink.

By the time I was in nursery school, I spoke 3 languages.  By the time I hit the end of elementary school, I was well on my way to 5.  Granted, now I don’t use some of those languages as much, I still enjoy being able to converse in them on occasion.

I once turned down a date (editor’s note: less SFW example here) because the fellow made a rather monumental mistake in a message he wrote to me.  Harsh?  Probably.  But he also used animated emoticons every few words, and after reading a few lines, I had a headache.  It was warranted.

Grammar geeks kind of get a bad rap these days, even though there are so many of us wandering around with our red pens.  Yeah, we can be a bit annoying sometimes, especially when we’re on edge.  But we do a good service to humankind on some days.

I can’t point to exactly when I became a lexophile, but words make my heart go pitter-patter.  There is nothing more impressive to me than someone who can throw down on the New York Times crossword puzzle.  I love the flexibility of language, and how words constantly change as they make their way into our mass usage.  Who knew “text” would become a verb, or for that matter “tweet” (still not as annoying as “facebooked” – yuck!)

Language is important to me.  I sometimes cringe when people make mistakes, but I am by no means the authority on it.  I don’t make (too many) judgments of people when they don’t know what something means, or spell a common word wrong.  That would be annoyingly erudite.

Now you don’t have to be some kind of super-genius to enjoy language or even to use it.  If this made me sound hideously high-brow, I didn’t mean it to.  We read and use language every day in so many ways.  For those of you who aren’t “readers,” I’m sure you’ve read your horoscope once in a while or caught headlines while in line at the bank.

Appreciate your language, what ever it is, and learn to love the grammar nerds in your life.  In some ways, we both entertain you and save your asses on occasion.  The next time you are trying to impress a date with something poetic or need a read-over on a presentation, remember we’re always lurking behind the words somewhere, saving the world from errant commas!

A while ago, I realized that while Needle, Meet Haystack may be my personal view on things, it isn’t the only view.  So every other Friday, you’ll be getting the chance to read some awesome guest posts from some truly excellent people – the Needle, Meet Haystack Guest Blogger Club.

Elisa Doucette is the blogger behind Ophelia’s Webb, where she shares her perspective on life, love, friendship and finding a place in the world.  She pulls double blogger duty as Portland, Maine’s own Carrie Bradshaw with her column, The Single Slice.  Elisa is also the woman behind the All You Need Series, which includes my first guest post for another blog.  Elisa’s post today is a companion piece to The Domesticated Bachelor.

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Photo Credit: Getty Images - Simon Bremner

You know that soft hazy glow that they filmed Doris Day movies in during the 1950′s & 1960′s? They achieved the look by smearing Vaseline on the lens. Some say they wanted her to look feminine and sweet with a softened view.  Most believe the reason was so many years of drinking, sun damage and smoking had left her skin (rumored to be slathered with Vaseline nightly, coincidentally) leathery and aged.

This is how women used to be seen. June Cleaver managed an entire household without a spot on her pleated skirt dress. Charlie’s Angels kicked lots of ass with perfectly feathered hair and never smeared lipstick. Carrie Bradshaw managed to rock the norm of what women can and can’t “talk about” on television but she did it all while obsessed with shoes and completely unrealistic outfits (seriously, who wears ballet tutus when they aren’t in a recital?!)

As Sir Isaac Newton philosophized, for every action there is an equal but opposite reaction.  So if men are losing their affinities for buffalo lodges and beer can-crushing and developing the skills of domesticated bachelorhood then it can only be assumed that women are losing their Vaseline-lensed existence of perfection and Gucci-obsession.

Is it possible that there is a growing population of Undomesticated Bachelorettes?

If there is, I’m pretty sure I’m their poster child.

Sure I’m TRYING to learn how to be more girly by wearing a Dress a Day in May.  And I’ve even been known to cook an occasional meal around the apartment. And sometimes I even manage to do the dishes or clean my bedroom. Sometimes.

The Undomesticated Bachelorette is not a lazy woman, her priorities and interests just tend to lie outside the home. In fact, she is generally a very driven and resourceful woman. How else would she survive and not need a crane to pull her from her house daily if not for extremely adept take-out dining skills?  (I know every place I can get a salad or 250 calorie sandwich within a 5 mile radius.)

She tends to not focus as much on the maintenance of her home because she isn’t there very often. This is not to say that she’s a social butterfly out on the town every night. She may well be, but more than likely, the Undomesticated Bachelorette is instead hanging out with friends at the local bar watching the game or chatting with co-workers late night or discussing the plot and sub-plot of the latest Owen Wilson/Vince Vaughn classic.

Life at home isn’t just hanging out in yoga pants occasionally after the gym; she’s out of heels and trousers within five minutes of walking through the door. The only thing in her fridge might be wine (white, of course, she at least knows that white should be chilled!). Her photo collection is not carefully taped into beautiful scrapbooks with swirls and twirls and girly prettiness, it’s in a shoebox under her bed. The only beauty regimen she knows is soap and water at night and Chap-stick for the day.

So does the Undomesticated Bachelorette NEED a Domesticated Bachelor to be happy? Well I’m not gonna lie, a boy who makes us dinner or can actually appreciate our best friend’s performance in community theatre DOES have its appeal.

But so does ordering Chia Sen’s Pu Pu Platter for two and having two people there to share it!

I recently rediscovered my old travel blog from back when I lived in London (no, you don’t get a link, unless you ask me on Formspring), which has taught me two things: 1) I’m a lot different than I was back then, and 2) Blogger sure keeps defunct blogs up for a long while.

As I took the trip down memory lane, I found one post that actually seemed like something I might have written only a few days ago.  It was markedly different in voice and tone than many of the other posts.  And it seemed good enough to share.  So, I present to you,  in the words of the Andrew of late 2006, a time-traveling, not-quite guest post… a tale of the communal bathroom:

I woke up the other day and was getting ready for class as usual. Walking to the bathroom to take a shower, I opened the door to find the tub two-thirds full of red Kool-Aid. I decided to use the bathroom at the other end of the hall instead. I was tired and at the time thought that maybe it was just very watery blood.

I returned to the building twelve hours later and noticed a sign on the bathroom door. It said:

Whoever left the bathroom like this needs to clean it up. This is not acceptable behavior.
Do you honestly expect housekeeping to clean this up?
-The Building Managers

I opened up the door and noticed the red liquid still in the tub. Sighing, I pulled the plug from the drain of the tub. It was gone in about three minutes. Later, some people filled the tub with dish soap to better clean it out.

It’s funny that the building managers took the time to:

• Open the door
• Assess the situation
• Go down six floors
• Draft a letter
• Proof the letter
• Print the letter
• Go back up the six floors
• Tape the letter to the door

When all they had to do was have one person step inside, reach down, and pull out the plug. I’m pretty sure there’s a good metaphor in there somewhere.