That might be stretching things slightly, but the epic single from New Jersey Resident/failed Haitian Presidential candidate Wyclef Jean and former wrestler-turned-actor “Dwayne” The Rock “Johnson” is not only one of the greatest underrated tunes of the past century, but a cornucopia of philosophy and insight into the human condition, the fleeting nature of fame, personal finance, relationships, gentrification, and consumerist society.  As it stands alone as a one-time duet, I often find myself weeping at the fate I have suffered, to not have been born into an alternate universe where the Rock/’Clef team crafted several full-length concept albums to showcase their unique, Outkast-esque* chemistry.  But with the way things stand, we are left with this one perfect morsel, a shining example of the collusion of melodic genius and touching social commentary:

This single track clocks in at under four minutes and is full of more intelligent thought than some doctoral theses.  Though it may at first seem like a gimmick record, cashing in on a celebrity cameo over a chorus, it is far, far more.  Starting out with a spoken-word declaration by the Rock himself, Wyclef announces himself with the deceptive line, “Yo, this is strictly a club record” – this is meant to put the audience at ease, allowing them to enjoy the song at whatever level they choose, from superficial to transcendent.

Jean spends the early parts of the song recalling his past struggles, trying to work his way into the social sphere he so admired and desperately wanted to be a part of.  ”Dedicated to everybody who used to stand outside in the cold,” he states as a general opening.  But soon after, Wyclef notes that “I used to stand outside hustlin’ my way in,” making his dedication more specifically to his past self than the listener.  It’s as if he’s creating the song as a sort of reverse-time capsule, hoping that he can send it back to his pre-Fugees self, to let him know that he has a bright future coming.  But he offers a warning, too, which can be found in the chorus.

The title of the song, and a line oft-repeated in a boisterous tone by The Rock, “It doesn’t matter” is a chameleon phrase, one that serves itself well on several levels.  In the sense of Jean’s ongoing narrative to the young man he once was, it is a reminder that despite his eventual luxuries (Bentleys, a home in Rio de Janeiro, a lovely and robust garden, and various dairy holdings), losing sense of his roots is a dangerous proposition.  ”Cause if you ain’t sharing, people ain’t caring.  Come up in the hood and take everything you’re wearing,” he warns.  Without paying back to those who helped him on his way to success, the future tells the past, the only outcome is a lonely, hollow victory where others will stop at nothing to take advantage of you.

On another level, the outburst can be seen as The Rock working as a conscience to Wyclef, reminding him that a man cannot be defined by his material possessions, lest he lose his true self among them.  ”It doesn’t matter you just bought a fresh Bentley!” The Rock bellows, indifferent to earlier claims of ownership of 50 more of the same.  For The Rock is the Virgil to Jean’s Dante, guiding him through the Hell of fame and recognition, keeping him from falling into ruin and despair, left with only fragments of the empire he once possessed.

Later in the song, our Refugee protagonist approaches a woman adorned with all manner of jewelry.  She has “so much ice [she] could freeze New York,” Wyclef tells us.  He then intimates that she must be provided for by a wealthy man, and inquires as to what her lover’s profession must be.  This raises two interesting notes, both pertaining to our narrator’s assumptions.  The first is that jean takes the woman’s appearance and accessories to mean that her paramour is successful, rather than the woman herself.  Jean’s success belies a bitter cynicism (possibly from past experience) that anyone who could offer him romantic comfort is primarily motivated by greed and a desire for what he has, so he operates under the impression that any woman he encounters will be the same as the last.  The second point of note is that Jean acts as if the other half of the relationship could not possibly be present – has past experience led him to believe that those who are drawn to men of power such as himself are inherently unfaithful?

Jean’s suspicions are proven correct when he gets a reply including an unprompted suffix clause: “He works on Wall Street; he’s only home two nights a week” the strumpet replies.  Though they continue their seduction game, he is now going through the motions, almost disheartened at the prospect of another lover who does not want to know him intimately outside of his income range and the bedroom.

Later in the conversation, Wyclef is asked, “Ain’t you that kid that sing Guantanamera, Way before Ricky Martin started Livin’ La Vida Loca?”  Historically speaking, this is an astonishing look at the diminishing rate of return on celebrity that began with the expansion of the Internet.  Jean’s “Guantanamera,” off of his first solo album, was released in 1997, two years before “Livin’ La Vida Loca” in 1999, which was a smash the year before “It Doesn’t Matter” hit shelves.  Jean sees fame and recognition as something that must be maintained consistently, as it loses its power over time.  Whereas he was a bona fide hit three years prior, he’s already seen as a relic thanks to the emphasis, “Way before Ricky Martin started” – a scant two years’ time and Jean is no longer a fresh face or a novelty.  By this time, Martin’s own star had begun to dim slightly, so the point-of-time reference makes the entire exchange seem that much more condescending to the star himself.  Just three years into his solo enterprise, and some see him as a has-been already.

It’s interesting to note the degree to which wealth is flaunted in this song.  Assuming the average cost of a Bentley with appropriate upgrades, maintenance and storage to be in the neighborhood of $300,000 for a new model (Jean making note of a “fresh” one, as discussed earlier), one can surmise that over $15 million was spent on the 51-vehicle fleet, which is entirely kept in the West Indies, for some reason.  Gambling for a high-roller (the chorus mentions having just won at Bingo) would easily be in the six-digit range as well.  Adding in extra homes, cash on hand, landscaping fees, side businesses and the other expenses mentioned (not to disregard appropriate security and cases for the two Grammys), Jean has spent upwards of $50 million within the context of this song alone.  His repetition of his holdings solidifies the belief that purchasing upper echelon goods is crucial to obtaining both the respect and acknowledgment of others in a consumer-based society.

It is interesting to note, however, that The Rock is more indifferent to such accolades and purchases.  ”It doesn’t matter if the Rock wants to go get diamond rings or not,” he claims, late in the track.  While Jean must bolster his image with purchases, stories and long-winded raps, The Rock, by contrast, needs say only a few simple words and maintain his image and personality to be looked upon fondly.  Although both men are stars in their own right, how they reinforce such a notion is inverted based on the identities that they have cultivated.

Ultimately, “It Doesn’t Matter” reflects on the age-old argument of perception versus reality.  Wyclef Jean represents the internal perception: his justification for the life he leads, noting the struggles and sacrifices and lessons he learned along the way, serves to bolster his perception of himself and a rationale for why he does what he does.  The Rock, meanwhile, represents the cynic in reality: oblivious and uncaring to Jean’s back-story, more interested in the finished product and the external result of the internal perceptions.  That’s why he speaks so loudly and angrily: rather than giving The Rock (the public) exactly what they want, Jean tries to let them in on a deeper level; the chorus reflects his fears that he will not be accepted or even looked at as more than a passing fad.

According to the Wikipedia entry for the song, the title and chorus were based around The Rock’s catchphrase, though one could argue that “Know Your Role” was ostensibly created to fulfill that purpose.  Regardless, such an interpretation could change the entire meaning and interpretation of the track.  The message and tone of the song would be radically altered from what we’ve discussed, turning it into a pop culture ouroboros of flashy phrasing and slick marketing.  How far would the effects of this song reach if it was nothing more than a wrestling tie-in to cash in? Perhaps the man himself said it best: “It doesn’t matter.”

* Not really

I’ll say that again: a show was just replaced with its almost-identical spin-off.

At about the time of the shift, it was also announced that if Law & Order Classic got renewed, it would be the longest-running drama in TV history (in the US, anyway), beating out Gunsmoke for top honors.  Instead, Law& Order Original Blend is being put out to pasture.  The only thing that is startling about this is why.

The difference between the stories in Law & Order v1.0 and L&O:LA isn’t as pronounced as in the other spin-offs, where the focus is on special victims or the intent of the criminals.  To an outsider, the only difference seems to be the locale (New York City versus Los Angeles) and the cast, even though Law & Order Grampa Version has had a lot of cast changes in its 20-year run.  So the only excuse I can think of is this:

NBC is “shaking things up.”  Again.

Now, granted, this has been proven to work.  Fans pop up out of the woodwork to support their shows, old viewers return, and people get excited to talk about the program again.  The problem is, this strategy loses a bit of currency every time it is used.

After all, it’s the strategy used for the Betty White episode of Saturday Night Live.

Or the Conan-Leno feud (and hey, I fell for it, too) – the ratings bump that resulted from the publicity from that bad decision was great.

The good thing about “shaking things up” is that it revitalizes a failing brand, creating a conversation about it and bringing in new and old viewers who have been drawn in by the controversy.  This in turn can translate to a surge of popularity and support.

The problem is, coming up with new conversations all the time doesn’t build a lasting allegiance; the numbers are often temporary.  In fact, this strategy of short-term thinking can often damage the brand overall, as viewers become more resistant to gimmicks, and long-time fans may feel betrayed.  Additionally, not taking public opinion into account (again, Re: Team Coco – and yes, that’s a real picture) creates backlash and problems with solvency of many of the brands involved.

So, if one does deign to use this approach, the hubbub must be justified – high quality content, loyalty incentives to keep the new followers while appeasing the old, and continuing to develop a solid brand relationship are all necessary to sustained success.  You can build off of a gimmick, but it requires a lot of work at relationship-building to justify the initial attention grabber.

Even if Law & Order Oh, That’s Still on TV?  With the Guy from ‘Kangaroo Jack’?  I Should Watch That gets a ratings boost and manages to inspire enough petitions to get its historic 21st season, or if the controversy leads to a record number of viewers for the first episode of L&O: LA, that’s no clear indicator of sustainable results.  They still need to earn the trust and respect of the viewers, and that’s not something that can be done as easily as getting that buzz.

So meet the new boss, same as the old boss – we don’t know how long they’ll be sticking around, but things might start feeling awfully familiar.

“Do or do not, there is no try.” – Yoda, Star Wars, Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Now, that’s just a silly sentence.  It’s partially true, but it’s pretty incorrect.  I mean, you can’t DO anything until you make the conscious decision to attempt to do it.  That’s the very definition of trying.  You try, and wind up doing or not doing.  So there most definitely IS a try.

But the thing that Yoda was correct on is that considering things in the extreme form can help.

There’s the old cop movie cliché that the world isn’t just black and white – there are shades of gray.  And sure, even in either-or situations, there are usually more than two options.  But the more choices we have, the more our actions and decisions can become muddled.  Saying you want to do something, or that you plan to do it, or even that you might do it isn’t enough.  Like Nike says, just DO it.

The power of personal conviction and strong self-esteem is vital to success.  Whether you believe in self-fulfilling prophecies or not, there’s something to be said for going gung-ho with a concept.  If you’re already of the belief that something will happen, you’re more apt to take the steps necessary to make it a reality.  if you think something might happen, it isn’t as critical, nor does it seem more than an idea.  By going full-force, you turn a concept into something tangible, even if it hasn’t been accomplished.

So maybe what Yoda should have said is something more like, “Try all you want, but make sure that done, your task is.”

I’ve been going through some of the stuff in Esquire, and there are a couple of amazing profiles that you should definitely read – one is on inventor extraordinaire and possible crazy person Dean Kamen (he created the Segway, among other things) and how he might save the world; the other is on film critic Roger Ebert and the aftereffects of his life-changing cancer surgery.  Both are fascinating reads that will not only give you something intelligent to talk about around the water cooler, but give great insight into the human condition.

How Dean Kamen’s Magical Water Machine Could Save the World and Roger Ebert: The Essential Man (both via Esquire)

In the book, Simmons espouses his philosophies on life, relationships and business.  And while I may disagree with some of the points he makes (re: marriage), he still makes a lot of sense.  A master of branding, merchandising and marketing, Simmons lets the reader into his head to see how the relentless promoting machine he calls a brain really works.

There are some great tips on expanding business, personal branding, motivation and fiscal responsibility that should be required reading for anyone interested in going the entrepreneurial route.  But be warned: some of the ideas presented in the book may seem misogynistic or reprehensible.  Nonetheless, it’s a fascinating read, and it belongs on the bookshelf right next to Seth Godin and David Ogilvy.

Sex Money Kiss (on Amazon.com)

You might not know Joel by his given name, but rather by his artistic persona: Grammy-nominated DJ and producer Deadmau5.

Putting aside the fact that tracks like “Faxing Berlin,” “Ghosts ‘N Stuff” and the Grammy-nominated “I Remember” are amazing productions in their own right, here are but a few lessons that Deadmau5 exemplifies:

• Personal branding through powerful symbols. The Deadmau5 logo is a bastardized version of the Mickey Mouse shape.  But it’s not just a logo – Joel has several giant ‘mau5 heads with eyes that strobe to the beat of the music that he wears when he plays.
• Social media and emerging technology optimization. Not only is his website cool and cutting-edge, but Deadmau5 was one of the first artists to come out with a branded iPhone app.  And it’s really good – it lets users become virtual DJs (with Deadmau5 music) – and has been updated several times to keep up with new iPhone/iTouch tech.  Plus, he made an awesome wristband for his fans that not only shows off their love and support of his music, but also contains albums, videos and other goodies on the built-in USB drive.
• Poster child for Boomerangs. If you missed what I said at the beginning of this post, the dude lived with his parents until he was 27.  With around 1/3 of people under 30 still at home, Joel’s success serves as an inspiration to all of us who chill with mom and dad on the weekends.
• Extreme location independence. Deadmau5 is a world-renowned DJ.  That means that he spends a lot of time travelling to play shows in different countries.  He produces music, tweets, blogs and releases updates all of the time.  He is a business machine.
• Adaptation to conventional business models.  He gained fame and renown in the genre of dance music, a category that thrives on singles, not albums.  And somehow, his debut album, Random Album Title, did very well commercially.

Deadmau5 is the perfect example for everything that Gen-Y bloggers talk about.  So why has no one talked about him?  My guess: they’re too busy enjoying “The Reward is Cheese.”

Which got me wondering – how did that happen?  How did Billy Mays become such a cultural touchstone that people are sad that he’s no longer making infomercials?  He was a TV pitchman, a role that isn’t typically associated with celebrity.  And then I remembered how Dick Van Dyke got famous.

In some PBS special I watched too long ago to remember the name of, Carl Reiner was being interviewed about The Dick Van Dyke Show, and was telling the story of its name.  When the creators were developing the show in 1961, they were having trouble finding a hook to draw viewers in.  None of the actors were well-known at the time, and the generic names the network offered for the series didn’t work.  So the creators took a gamble and named the show after their leading man.  Dick Van Dyke wasn’t a celebrity then, but his eponymous show created self-fulfilling prophecy that made him a celebrity.  After all, he had his own show – he HAD to be someone!

Similarly, Billy Mays was endorsing a lot of products with the strength of his pitches resting on his opening line, “Hi, Billy Mays here…”  Who was Billy Mays?  Well, if he was on TV endorsing something, he HAD to be someone!

The key is total brand confidence.

Both Dick Van Dyke and Billy Mays were thrust on stage (metaphorically speaking) and through sheer force of will and conviction, people accepted that they had value and were worth paying attention to.  Sure, it’s a more risky gambit than creating a persona over time, but if you can present your brand with enough charisma, and then back it up by showing utility, people will take notice and follow.

However, this move can be overplayed.  After all, what’s more pathetic than someone saying “Don’t you know who I am?”  If you have to resort to this, you’ve already lost, and your brand loses value.  All you need is to confidently say something that gets across the message, this is who I am, and this is what I can do.

It might sound simple, or even a little contrived.  But getting by on the strength of one’s name has worked since the early days of television.  So give it a try – there’s no shipping or handling involved.

Basically, the network has decided that drastically altering their primetime schedule and creating an almost-solid (except for the local news) block of four evening talk shows isn’t such a good idea.  The ratings have been poor, and rescheduling the different shows might not help much.  Conan O’Brien might lose his shaky grasp of The Tonight Show, Jimmy Fallon will be competing with infomercials for ratings, and Carson Daly (remember him?) will be cast off from the network.

The person who is most affected by this decision is O’Brien, who was given a late night institution, only to watch as the network showed their lack of faith in his abilities by giving Jay Leno another show whose very presence trivializes Conan’s promotion.  There have been suggestions that O’Brien quit and find a home at another network – 15 years on the air have helped him create a powerful brand – but the problem is, where will he go?

CBS has firmly established a counterpoint to NBC’s lineup with David Letterman and Craig Ferguson’s shows.  ABC has Jimmy Kimmel doing late-night hosting.  The CW isn’t making much money and seems to be more interested in teen dramas.  So that leaves Conan a choice of moving to FOX, a network whose record of late night talk shows is spotty at best, or cable.

Leno’s Reverse-Chappelle*  has forced Conan into a situation that many of us have found ourselves in at one time or another: an Either-Or debacle.  Either Conan takes his lumps with NBC and hopes that everything works out okay, or he quits (keep in mind that the jobs and paychecks of all of the people who work on his show would go with him).  But, as with the seemingly limited number of options that are presented to us when we’re between a rock and a hard place, he has a third option.

He can make his own choice.

Conan has proven that he has a powerful brand that attracts younger viewers.  His audience is more likely to categorize him with Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert than Letterman or Leno.  So if he wants to send a message showing not only his brand power but also his utility, he needs to mobilize his fan base in a way that his network bosses will notice.

Online petitions don’t really do anything, but ratings do.  A concentrated online campaign to increase the number of Tonight Show viewers might help (ie: “Save Conan by watching”) as it attracts his fan base through a medium that they are comfortable with.  He could partner with Leno, as Letterman suggests, and co-host the Tonight Show, helping to increase his visibility and popularity among viewers who may have left when he took over the show.

There are many things that we can learn from the current trials and tribulations of Conan O’Brien. Getting a promotion does not increase your job security.  Your personal brand value is a constantly shifting thing.  You’re allowed to diss your own network on your show.  Even when it seems like you have very limited options, you can create your own solutions.

When you’re developing your brand and establishing yourself in a new position with a company, it’s difficult to find solid footing, and even harder to do when the rug is pulled out from under you.  But if you can maintain your brand, demonstrate your utility and come up with your own solution to solve the problem, you’ll come out ahead.

UPDATE: It looks like Conan chose the third option.

*Dave Chappelle, as you might remember, quit his show and a huge paycheck when he didn’t like the direction that it was going in.  Conversely, Leno continues to stick around and collect what I imagine to be cloth sacks with a dollar sign printed on the side that are full of money.

Of course, he had to watch his parents get murdered in front of him in an alley (called “Crime Alley,” which was a pretty big tip-off if you ask me) before he devoted himself to a lifelong pursuit of justice against evildoers, so that’s a top contender on anyone’s “Reasons To Not Be Batman” list.  Another item that would be on that list is the investment that Bruce Wayne made to become the Caped Crusader.

According to a study that I can’t believe people actually paid money for, it would take someone 20 years in the real world to become Batman.  In addition to a more diverse and difficult training regime than that of a decathlete and a Michael Phelps-ian diet, there’s the need for consistent education and the mastery of (or at least high competency at) scores of different skills.  So there’s a high opportunity cost to becoming Batman.

When you analyze his motivations, Batman was originally created by Bruce Wayne with the specific purpose of avenging the deaths of his parents.  So his goal was essentially to extract revenge upon the mugger who killed them – Joe Chill in the comics, Jack Napier in the Tim Burton movies.  In both cases, Batman did avenge his parents by disposing of (but not killing) their murderer.  So, for all intents and purposes, Bruce Wayne could give up being Batman now that he had accomplished his original goal.  Instead, he escalated it.

His new mission became something along the lines of, “Protect the citizens of Gotham City and fight crime,” which, while admittedly generic, allows him to continue being Batman.  And why shouldn’t he?  While it might shorten his lifespan, he has judged that this is an acceptable sacrifice, predicated on the 20 (estimated) years of preparation.  The opportunity cost of the training is still higher than the cost of continuing to be Batman (see The Dark Knight for a better explanation).

Batman’s goal-setting is indicative of a pattern that you can apply to your own life.  Many people spend months, if not years, training themselves to be proficient at a specific professional competency through college, trade school, certification classes, seminars, apprenticeships and so on.  And yet, many of these abilities are not fully cultivated; people move on to another field, quit their position altogether, or only obtain the skills to accomplish one thing, then promptly forget them.

Batman punches people who do that in the face.

Instead, take the skills and education that you’ve been developing and apply them to your new career path.  Customer service can be applied to dealing with co-worker conflicts.  Database management can be used to create a more efficient task management system.  Plumbing can be used to fix the leaky faucet in the break room.  And so on.

Additionally, Batman teaches us that once we accomplish a long-term goal, we should not rest on our laurels and become inefficient.  One should create a new goal that builds off of the last one to stay motivated and keep working effectively.  Although it doesn’t have to be as lofty and almost impossible as a war on crime itself, building new goals on top of each other is a good way to continue to develop personally and professionally.

So the next time you find yourself asking what to do now that you’ve completed another long-term goal, just ask this question: What Would Batman Do?

After the movie ended and we all reflected on our shared viewing experience (before getting snack refills and popping in Rio Bravo), I realized something: Clint’s badassery wasn’t just a role, nor was it just his attitude.

It was his brand.

Although many people consider the term “personal branding” to refer to establishing one’s own online reputation through a website, blog, social networks and so on, it refers to a grand tradition centuries older than the Internet.

It’s likely that the concept of the personal brand came about when Og the caveman was able to convince Ug, Thak and all of the other Cro-Magnons that he should become leader of their tribe (which had never before had a leader), and was given the position.  He had found a way to establish himself as a leader, and kept that position and brand until he was trampled by a wooly mammoth.

Personal branding has gone beyond leadership and government to include writers, artists, military personnel, and almost any famous person in all of history.  In fact, one of the best examples of personal branding at its best and worst is the celebrity.

Going back to Clint Eastwood for a minute, one can find a clear delineation between the roles he chose and the image (and subsequent success) that he cultivated from them.  Eastwood, like Western peers John Wayne and Lee Van Cleef, chose roles as a stoic hero (or anti-hero) for almost all of his films.  Even in some of his less genre-specific movies (i.e.: Every Which Way But Loose), he kept a consistent stable of attitudes, mannerisms, actions and reactions that branded the characters as his.  Clint Eastwood has never been a character actor.  Any character that he played would come off as Clint Eastwood’s interpretation of that character

On the other side of the Western Actor Branding Scale, we have thespians like Eli Wallach and Yul Brynner.  While these actors varied the roles, character types, film genres and performances that they gave in each movie, giving them a wider audience into some areas that Wayne or Eastwood might not reach as well, they did not gain as much recognition or acclaim.  Because they let the characters overshadow their own personalities, giving iconic performances as people other than themselves.

When developing your personal brand, a key factor to success is consistency.  If your actions don’t match your words, your resume doesn’t match your experiences or the Google results for your name don’t match your industry, you have a big brand management problem.

If you take the character actor’s method, you might have a more diverse array of skills and competencies, but you will have a diluted personal brand that will not help you establish yourself in your chosen field.  Instead, you need to commit yourself to Eastwood’s method and stay on-point with your messages.  It’s not something that you can pause or turn off – everything you do reflects on the brand of You.

You are your brand.

This might sound a little daunting, but it should come as more of a relief.  You’ve been building your personal brand for years through your education, work experiences, personality and skills.  You already have an intrinsic knowledge of your personal brand and how to best apply it to get what you want.  You can add a web presence, but your personal brand’s product, CEO and mascot has been, and will always be, you.

So the next time you’re trying to boost your personal brand to get more attention from prospective employers, get more hits on your blog or make yourself known socially, make sure to stay on point with a consistent message.  It worked for Clint Eastwood.

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This post was written for the FortuneCity.com Personal Branding Series on BrazenCareerist.  If you haven’t signed up for the site already (even though we talked about this), do it now and check out some awesome career, business and life blogs.